EXAMINING THE ORGASM
By Taylor Wane
Spend less time worrying about orgasms and more time acquiring the knowledge needed to experience the sexual pleasure that most of us desire and need. Orgasms rank top of the list as a Stress Buster and a “feel good’ enhancer, contributing to a ‘sense’ of content.
Knowing your body so well you can make yourself orgasm in seconds is a double edged sword because when you are with a partner and they are having a hard time bringing you to climax you secretly want to push them out of the way to get the job done right! But you could do THAT ALONE! So, as important as it is to know your own body it’s also just as important to let go of the Reines and let someone else discover your body for a change, you may discover something pleasurable about your body you didn’t know.
Most people find the more orgasms they have, the more easily they orgasm in the future and the more they want. (Hence ‘use it or lose it’, this applies to abstinence, you can become ‘dry’ and not have the desire) The opposite also applies, the more you enjoy healthy, natural orgasms, they more you desire . Whether you’re looking for immediate gratification or long-term payoff, learning more about your orgasmic potential will likely bring satisfaction on several levels.
One big headache and a mood killer is when either partner is having a hard time getting there as quickly as you might hope. It can feel intimidating for both people involved when it seems to be taking forever….
Quick fix for this problem (if its a problem at all, maybe you love giving Oral Sex and you never tire- You rock by the way!! LOL :) is to have FOREPLAY before FOREPLAY…
Yes, there is FOREPLAY before FOREPLAY… We did it when we were kids before we had ever engaged in getting to 2nd or 3rd base. Remember that feeling when you only got to touch outside the clothes and kiss. All you could feel was the warmth of the genitals through the clothes, or the nipple becoming erect under the blouse. Well, as aroused as it made you then it still works for both people. Build up to the Foreplay with some slow sexy teasing and rubbing. Slipping your hand up her skirt and rubbing the outside of her panty crotch slowly and gently will get her motor running for sure, and don’t be in a hurry! Once you have both ‘made out’ for a while you will both be very ready for Foreplay and those Orgasms will come much easier.
Instead of using other means to get your lovers mojo running or letting them get going alone, why not put yourself in the picture. These days it seems everyone is in a hurry all the time, instant gratification.. Well, time to SLOW IT DOWN.
Slowly Tease your lover, strut, gyrate, do a little strip, tell them to touch themselves while they watch you put on a slow, seductive show for them. Maybe find a mirror you can both stand in front of and put on a show for yourself. Just make sure to slow it all down, and tease, ease into that foreplay, build into the passion, into that foreplay, then eventually into the hot, explosive sex with a huge Orgasm as your reward for your patience.
Types Of Orgasms
There are different types of Orgasms and none more important or dominant than the other. Both of them can satisfy in different ways.
Clitoral versus Vaginal Orgasms
Extensive Studies have been performed over and over by many well known psychologic such as Sigmund Freud, Sexologist Dr Alfred Kinsey and Anthropologists Dr. Helen Fisher (who was hired by Match.com to build Chemistry.com) as well as many others in the seemly never ending confusion over Human Sexuality, arousal and bonding. It has yet to be determined as to whether humans are designed to be Monogamous or if Polygamy is really what they want if they could only stop the jealousy and other human emotional feelings pertaining to “sharing’ a lover or partner. Some believe that Monogamy is taking a partner for LIFE, although LIFE seems a long time when ‘The HoneyMoon’ Stage passes.
This distinction was popularized by Sigmund Freud, who linked orgasm to our psychological development. A clitoral orgasm is brought about by clitoral stimulation and a vaginal one through vaginal penetration. Freud argued that clitoral orgasms were characteristic of the young and immature, and vaginal orgasms represented the healthy Adult female sexual response. This theory Suggested that a woman who could only have orgasms from clitoral stimulation was stuck in her development and was not able to become a Mature Woman and lover. This theory has also been discounted, although there are still a few curious researchers who still believe in the idea. An additional problem with this distinction is that it doesn’t describe how the orgasms feel or what their detailed physiological or psychological effects are, it focuses on the method of achieving orgasm only.
Not often discussed it the Anatomical aspects to the different orgasms and the effects that both orgasms has on the subject.
In the Female there are at least 2 Major Orgasms- CLITORIS/VAGINAL (although there are many proven sexual sensations that could be classified as an orgasm).
Clitoris Versus Penis- The formations that happen during the development of the Urinary and reproductive organs make the male and female sex organs generally homologous (different versions of the same structure).
Clitoral (and most common) is equivalent to the type of Orgasm a Male has in the Neuroanatomy aspect of how the Nerve impulses run from the Clitoris as does the Penis, up the spine and to the brain, thus resulting in an Orgasm that leaves us “wiped out”.
The Clitoris is the human females most sensitive Erogenous Zone and primary source of Female Sexual Pleasure.
As with a Penis, the clitoris is a complex structure, and its size and sensitivity can vary. It is said to be roughly the size of a Pea and is estimated to have more sensory nerve endings than any other part of the human body.
Going back to my earlier conversation about teasing and foreplay before foreplay, just a gentle tickle or rub outside the panties on the clitoris can get her motor running in NO time.. Sometimes more than often, less is more when stimulating the clitoris. It’s a delicate little bud, so don’t be so heavy handed!
The Orgasm that is experienced via stimulation of the Clitoris is a powerful, earth moving Orgasm. This orgasm can easily be described as “La Petite Mort” - French for the Little Death. Because in those few moments of incredible pleasure so many things are happening. Because the orgasm that comes from the Clitoris as in the Penis, is controlled by the involuntary or autonomic nervous system, some brain function is inhibited, thoughts are scattered if not silenced, the body is unable to do much until you gather yourself again after the refractory period is over. The hormones released such as Oxytocin and Prolactin give you a sense of well being and peacefulness. Having regular full filing sex and orgasm with a partner has proven to be a ‘stress- buster’ and leads to a general sense of satisfaction.
Studies have shown that women in a relationship with a man who frequently brings her to orgasm is less likely to cheat or became restless in the relationship.
SEXUAL MANIPULATION-Males who withhold giving pleasure to their partner in order to maintain the Dominant or Alpha position in the relationship may be playing with fire. Although by withholding giving Orgasms to their partner they leave their partner in a constant state of ‘wanting’, thus making their partner more likely to ‘give’ sex when ever it is wanted in hopes that this will be the time he brings her to orgasm, this approach may lead the Female to search for a more ‘giving’ partner.
Other Sexual Sensory Erogenous zones that could bring someone to orgasm are G-Spot, Nipple stimulation, Anal Stimulation and many other highly erotic zones.
The Vagina located in comparison to the Male anatomy is where the Perineum is, although the Female still has a perineum, most of the area is taken up by the Vagina. This highly erogenous zone for both males and females is a diamond shaped area located between the pubic symphysis and coccyx (tale bone).
It has been suggested that the Male Perineum has a noninvasive method to determine male feminization.
In both Males and Females “Orgasm” can be achieved from stimulation in this area, although in the female penetration is possible because of the Vaginal Opening. In both cases there are no Nerves that run from this area to the spine and thus to the brain. This means that an Orgasm achieved from either the Vagina or Perineum does not give you “La Petit Mort”, because the autonomic nervous system has not been involved here. The good news about this orgasm is that People will spinal injuries, even wheel chair confined folk could achieve an orgasm through stimulation in this region as the spine and nerves that run up the spine are not entirely engaged or necessary for this orgasm.
Because of the close proximity of the Anus to the Perineum, stimulation around the Anus can also bring the person to “orgasm’ in a similar manner as the Vaginal or Perineum Orgasm.
However, in the Female when the Vaginal Orgasm is achieved there is a vast amount of Clear Fluid excreted from the vagina. There is still a little mystery and debate over G-spot, squirting, Vaginal Orgasms.
I do believe that a Vaginal Orgasm is different from G-spot stimulation and squirting and Vaginal Orgasm is achieved from Deep Vaginal Stimulation and thrusting ( note that the G-spot will still be stimulated in this act but not Isolated to that Area where the G-spot is located. While studying and reading other papers and documents pertaining to Orgasm I was alarmed at how some others write about what they feel is the Vaginal or G-spot Orgasm. It seems there is much confusion and mystery about the Female Vaginal Orgasm, some even suggesting it does NOT exist! LMAO!
Squirting suggests ejaculating the fluid from the Vagina, whereas when a Vaginal Orgasm is happening, the woman can excrete fluid for as long as the Sex or deep stimulation is happening. Perhaps even 30 mins or more. The fluid just either flows out, drips out, seeps out, but not necessarily “Squirts” out.
The Vaginal Orgasm is extremely pleasurable but not as intense as a Clitoris but one should not be pitted against the other.
Orgasm can also be achieved from Nipple or Anus stimulation as both are also connected to the Autonomic Nervous System. Nipple stimulation caused the release of Oxytocin (hormone best known for its roles in sexual reproduction, boding, and maternal behaviors) and prolactin (lactating).
Oxytocin is released during such petting motions as Kissing, nipple stimulation, caressing, and sexual engagement. This hormone is the bonding hormone that promotes “tribal” behavior, and also combines trust and empathy. Its our bodies way of giving us “rose-tinted glasses” thus enabling us to “BOND’ with another human.
Because of social issues, views and behaviors over time we know much more about the Male orgasm and how to achieve it because it has long been acceptable for Males to receive pleasure and give themselves pleasure unlike females who culturally though out the ages were expected to not do such things or want such things.
The male species as the female also has different types of Orgasms.
The most common being from THE PENIS and then a Prostate/G-Spot orgasm
Depending on the male there are many ways to stimulate this area. Some men like it rougher whereas others want you to Handle with care. There is also the Foreskin factor. Males WITH a foreskin have much more sensitivity and feeling because the foreskin is a mass of Nerve Receptors. Many sexologists view the foreskin as “a complex, erotogenic structure that plays an important role ‘in the mechanical function of the penis during sexual acts, such as penetrative intercourse and masturbation. Some view the circumcision as Male Mutilation .
There are many variants as male preference differs. Some men find it hard to reach orgasm via ORAL SEX, and need intercourse to finish. This of course can be either physical or psychological.
Either way, it is wise to pay attention to how your lover responds to different approaches when stimulating them.
PROSTATE OR G-SPOT STIMULATION
The G-Spot or Sacred Spot of a man is his prostate gland.
Why is prostate massage pleasurable? There are number of reasons:
No matter which method is used it is not possible to touch the prostate directly. The nearest indirect access is through the rectal wall, which means that there is still a membrane in the way. This is somewhat akin to the inhibiting sensitivity a glove. Despite this restriction the lobes of the prostrate are highly sensitive to pressure. An array of sensations may be produced by pressing, rubbing or by means of stroking the gland through the rectal wall. The most profound of these feelings is similar to that sublime sensation which is normally felt during ejaculation, as the prostate begins pumping semen.
Along with the genital areas, the anus is connected to and interwoven with millions of delicately sensitive nerve endings, which can yield most pleasurable sensations.
Unknown to most, over one third of the penis is buried inside the body. It is the base of the (hidden) penis which may be pressured in a similar manner as the prostate. The effect of stimulating all three can be awesome, if done in concert with genital stimulation. Still more overwhelming than the physiological effects is the psychological aspect of prostate massage, due to the unaccustomed nature of penetration of the receiver.
Remarkably, when the moment comes the giver will notice that the finger will seem to be drawn into the anus. Once the finger has been allowed to enter it is best to be still allowing the anal sphincters the chance to become accustomed to the intrusion. It will not be a good idea for the giver to move their finger in and out of the anus. There should only be one reason for the giver to remove the finger, and this would be to add more lubrication.
The giver is now ready to seek out the prostate.
this can easily accomplished by crooking the inserted finger upwards, and feeling for a “roundish” to oblong protrusion about 2 inches inside the rectum. Applying pressure to the prostate will provide a variety of sensations, the most desirable of which is the feeling of impending ejaculation. By applying more or less pressure to the gland, the giver will be able to control these sensations; even to the point of inhibiting the receiver from ejaculating. The ability to control ejaculation through prostate massage, allows for nearly unending stimulation of the receiver’s genitals. The penis may be massaged by the giver, or by receiver himself, to a point of near ejaculation. Only to be kept on the brink by varying pressure on the prostate.
If the giver is very giving, they can continue to stimulate the penis by either hand masturbation or mouth stimulation while also stimulating the prostate and rectal area. This should give the receiver the ultimate pleasure by having all of these erogenous zones stimulated simultaneously.
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